I am overjoyed, boundlessly overjoyed (which implies a hypothetical boundary of joy, but I assure you, we’ve long since bypassed any such boundaries if they were to exist). Why, may you ask? Because there is one more day off. One more restful, stupid, getting the chance to flail and be stupid about the diet, getting the chance to be just a completely unconcerned idiot kind of day.
I’m showing up here, though, because I’ve invented this habit and I don’t want to be the one who says that it’s too difficult to both sit on the couch and blog. Not when Misha Collins ran nearly 83 kms today for charity just because he said he was going to run and see how far he could go. Seriously. No joke. That man is inspiration in a can. Between he and Cmdr. Shepard, I’ve got some badass good spirits to follow after on Labor Day.
Hmm. So today was Sunday, which feels very fuzzy and disorienting to pin down. Sunday. Food wise, diet wise – definitely a day of pluses and minuses. Ate a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and grapes and some french fries and some of a Denny’s sandwich which, to no one’s great surprise, wasn’t terribly fantastic (not bad, though, and I kind of dug how this diner was actually decorated like a diner. An art deco, groovy diner. Doesn’t change the fact that it was still a Denny’s and Denny’s are meant for after midnight when you don’t care what you’re eating, you just want to be with your friends and have chili cheese fries and laugh at the fact you’re eating in a Denny’s). Um, sorry for the long aside there, I also ate ramen and chocolate ice cream. But! That really does not take into account all the small portions, the things I said no to, or the fact that I didn’t murder someone when we didn’t have dessert. Or the fact that I’m continuing to drink water every day – a very positive human thing to do.
Also, we kept another of our small lexicon of words today, and went for a walk. Broke through that ridiculous but insistent resistance that doesn’t want to walk or really do anything but slowly degrade into a thick, pink goo right here on the loveseat. There was a bit of an internal war which the good side won. A bit of a start there, though. Also, bought some shakes and cheese sticks because I trust them and me with them.
I was thinking that I love the weekends, obviously, since they’re my last real, untethered sense of freedom until next Friday at 5:00pm, but I really am so wildly wide open with my time that everything seems urgent and important to tackle and I completely paralyze myself. Small steps, taking it bird by bird and we can find a way through the head games. This is the year of coulds and shoulds being converted into things that are tangible – that “are.” This is the year of change.