When I woke up like a bolt of lightning had run through me at nearly 5:00am, I was curious as to how the remainder of the day would go. I woke up and got up and got shake and lingered a bit, laying there, drinking what I actually find as enjoyable as any Starbucks I’ve ordered. I actually finish my shakes more often than not which I can rarely ever say for the former.
Well, it seems, that the energy has stayed with me.
Energy that has allowed me to exercise for forty-five minutes without feeling panicky and nervous and heart-fluttery which usually freaks me out just enough to stop. My music was fast-paced and my stomp walking with Leslie Sansone felt like…exercise. It felt legit even if everyone and Cindy Crawford is lifting weights and doing yoga. It was forty-five actual minutes and I felt every drop of that serotonin moving through me. Oh, this, this is why people do this?
I have to imagine that just the regular walking and getting up and moving around that I’ve been doing in January has helped make it easy to shift a bit. I’d half-planned just to see if my XBox would even play the DVD or if it had been scratched and ruined at some point between now and the last time I attempted this. Caffeine, I’m sure played a role, but today…I don’t know.
Energy that stuck with me, too, to take garbage and recycling out, to wash pots and pans, attempt to make chicken stock (celery but no carrots, it is going to need work.), go to the store and try and find size 6 riding boots to zero avail, but ended up coming home with some random chicken, random Bordeaux-hued lipstick, some more gum, and some soda. Slowly working on pushing that pop out of my life again. To do laundry. Order groceries. Contemplate if in the next month or two if I want to try making keto bread.
And soon, hopefully, if I can stop distracting myself with random nonsense, make up my bed with some nice, clean sheets.
That’s a lot for me. Maybe you and yours have all this shit locked down, but I am in a constant state of personal revelation when I handle anything without spending hours letting the thoughts run around in my mind, percolating a few drops of high-octane willpower before collapsing in a heap of your own making.
I know that better habits – habits at least like not buying Starbucks, even the low-sugar macchiato – make for days like this. And if you can stack a few days like this, you can make your surroundings a place where you can trust that you have a clean bowl to cook your slightly more complicated low-carb food in and you’ve got space to move around in and you’ve got time as well. So you don’t block yourself out of your own plans.
A little scary, mostly wonderful to contemplate.
The eventualities of sticking with this for a full year. What it will mean.