Baby Bully

sunset-on-glass-1441481-1279x927 (1)Today we celebrated Mom’s birthday. Hopefully, she agrees. A bit of cake and dinner and we did a puzzle, walked the flying canine paroxysms and I, obviously, was incredibly amusing. From what I can tell, there’s an overall positive cast on my mom’s health situation right now and so whatever combination of medicine, mojo, magic, luck, well-wishes and prayers is flowing through right now, it can just keep on flowing.

I have discovered the horizontal line.

I mean, I knew dividers existed, I just didn’t think about how valuable it might be in terms of reflecting my scattershot, stream-of conscious style of word vomit in a way that might slightly add clarity.

A to-do list.

  1. Get up early enough to find your goddamned glasses.  If nothing else occurs tomorrow, this is bar-none, unavoidable, top priority.  It’s way too dark in here and I’m blind as a bat to look now, but fuck, I need to have usable vision in the morning.  I have no idea where they ended up between yesterday and today, but oy. Gotta sell those dresses and be able to read the sizes on them.
  2. Go to bed early enough to handle getting up just that brief bit early without visceral hatred in your heart about it.  Get up early enough to wear some makeup and have an outfit on that you don’t absolutely hate.  Find those sandals!
  3. Deposit your darling, precious loving secondary paycheck. Maybe put a deposit down on your magical necklace, but don’t go crazy thinking you have money cause you don’t.
  4. Make a list of shit you gotta pay and see what can be done about paying it.
  5. Get at least five of these water bottles filled and in the freezer and the rest of them to recycling so they stop solemnly staring at you with their half-empty, half-full visual metaphoric aggression.
  6. Wash this hair and buy some box dye to take care of these hateful roots.  It’s going to be a hell of a long time till you can justify a $150 salon price tag, long enough that whatever shameful attempt you make to correct these dark brown six-inch roots attached to the rest of your bleached blonde head will grow out, too.
  7. Figure out a healthy option for lunch and dinner and eat those things – it can be imperfect, but we gotta halt this gratuitous crap train that we’re on.  Don’t let yourself get any further than healthy option.  Use your hour off.  Thinking about maybe making an actual grocery list and making some actual food to take as a sack lunch.  Buy some brown paper bags, maybe?
  8. Work as hard as you can on ignoring your phone and the impulse to refresh to see if the Correspondence continues or what is up.  Because nothing is up and life will go on and you already have at least eight things to worry about.  Disappointment about that is blocking other energies.  You can feel it.
  9. Let imperfect people, situations, conversations, performances, behaviors, results go.

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