Gents or Dames: Day Two Hundred Thirty-One

By: L.

Aug 18 2014

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Category: self

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Aperture:f/4.5
Focal Length:7.4mm
ISO:80
Shutter:1/100 sec
Camera:DMC-FZ30

So, yeah, I spent a certain percentage of the day thinking about this dude.  I spent a certain percentage of my time cursing the fact that his name is way, way, way too common and I know absolutely no other information to refine the search on Facebook.  I spent more than all of that combined reminding myself that it doesn’t matter, like at all, and that I am idly wasting my time trying to start shit that is categorically a non-starter because even if he didn’t mind me or anything on that warmer side of the scale during our ten minutes of interaction yesterday, I have to turn up on Saturday and hope that he’s there (when it’s maybe a 50/50 shot) and that before his time with us is up, find some way to make any kind of impact when I can hardly look him in the eye and am feeling really vulnerable in the whole body issue area.  Because I won’t be here next Saturday and it won’t be much longer before there’s no reason to drive from wherever he’s from

He remembered old boss who he liked because everyone liked old boss at least conceptually.  He likes the idea of us even if he doesn’t care about me.  But he shouldn’t be back at all.  He’s back because he or something got fucked up and we’re a pleasant place to pass those court-appointed hours.  I mean, you have to think twice about someone who finds themselves in a lot of trouble on the regular.

But I suppose that’s what people do.  They get over it when they think they’ve got reason enough to do so.

Oh shit, oh shit, I have just spent the past hour or more looking at Bioshock splicer masks and eventually ordering this bunny mask for the whole aquarium part of this trip and I realize how damn ridiculous I am because that means I have a little over fifteen minutes to write just about have of this post and I don’t have much more to say about this flavor of the month crush I’m nursing.   Until I tell you I have him ensnared and wrapped around my little finger, there’s no real reason for anyone to pay attention.  My sister’s working hard as hell on my Bee dress and I am super very excited to wear it and I am getting kind of excited about this very easy alternate costume that I don’t have to ask any help with where I can just be a deranged undersea vintage woman in a rabbit mask (even if those masks are hard to come by and it’s not the cost that kills you, it’s the shipping so that I have a chance to do anything with it before we go otherwise, it’s going to turn into some sort of halloween costume, but I don’t think they’d let me wear anything blood spattered to hand out Christmas calendars to local children.

Hey, that went fast.  We’re going to Godzilla tomorrow and I feel out of sync with my body and the universe. Calloo callay!

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